WestWord Cites Whup-Ass Master's Vance Fulkerson Story!

We are now part of the cultural zeitgeist. 

On Tuesday, we posted a heart-warming note to aging toupee-wearer Vance Fulkerson, a repulsive man who taught at our alma mater and is currently facing charges of getting a tad sexually exploit-y with the young 'uns and collecting snapshots of toddlers acting slutty. Since then, our traffic has exploded. We've gotten oodles of emails from the Be-wigged One's former students, each with a more horrific story to tell, each thanking us for writing about it.

And now, WestWord (the only remotely cool newspaper in Denver), has published a lil' piece about yours truly and our cute COWA bloggy thing.

Sharing is caring.

xox
WAM

P.S. Lest any nudges out there accuse us of exploiting a vulnerable dude for our selfish enjoyment, that's precisely what this snake has been doing for decades. Turn-around, while fair play, is hardly advisable in the presence of Vance.

Vance Fulkerson likes to secretly film underaged boys subscribing to this blog's feed.

Comments

[Jan]

Congratulations!

And I accuse you of nothing. Well, except of being a hoot.

[Rambosf]

What is sad is that when we were children, we were not empowered to tell the authorities about abuse like this. When I was a teenager, there were stories of a Priest at the local Catholic Church and sure enough, he was arrested many years ago...finally. This was common knowledge among the kids, but no one came forward.

In this case, you have probably helped the prosecution by providing them with additional witnesses. These older witnesses will show that his sexual abuse was not a one time thing, but behavior that he has maintained for his whole life.

Thank you for coming forward and helping convict this creep.

[Flaquita]

"Turn-around, while fair play, is hardly advisable in the presence of Vance."

This is why I love you man. Keep up the good work!

[Whup-Ass Master]

Gracias, Flaquita!

xox
WAM

[Burberry Handbags]

We're certain it seemed like a good idea at the time. But you look like you're attending the funeral of your sanity. See here's the thing. You're a trend-setter. Do you really want the entire world to start wearing their underoos as outerwear? Have you given the slightest thought to the potential ramifications? For starters, it would force us to cover our furniture in plastic. Is that what you really want?

[Hermes Birkin]

Vesuvius) to a maximum security brassiere and they rebelled by erupting. The point being while fashion has never been about comfort, it shouldn't incinerate your fans in a pyroclastic flow. But no, we held our tongue. Because any gal whose boobs are wont to spew magma and embarks on a career as a disco diva (instead of, say, an X-man), has spunk in our book. Besides, any concert during which a performer zaps her frankenboobs to life is well worth the ticket price.

But now, Lay-Ga...now we're concerned for your mental health. How we wish we could have read your mind today when you stood before your vast wardrobe. We're more than a little curious about the thought process that caused you to strap a JC Penney's "naughty grandma" underwire bra over your Mary Poppins blouse, hike up a pair of crotchless satin Depends, and secure a Charo wig to your noggin with what appears to be the wrapper from a Hickory Farms "deepest sympathy" cheese and fruit basket.

[Coach Factory Outlet Online]

blouse, hike up a pair of crotchless satin Depends, and secure a Charo wig to your noggin with what appears to be the wrapper from a Hickory Farms "deepest sympathy" cheese and fruit basket.

We're certain it seemed like a good idea at the time. But you look like you're attending the funeral of your sanity. See here's the thing. You're a trend-setter. Do you really want the entire world to start wearing their underoos as outerwear? Have you given the slightest thought to the potential ramifications? For starters, it would force us to cover our furniture in plastic. Is that what you really want?

You look like (pick one):

Morgan Fairchild in a very special Lifetime movie-of-the-week called "Not Without My Mom-jeans," the heart warming story of a woman who goes into mourning when The Gap discontinues their line of high-waisted acid wash stretch pants
The winning design from that episode of Project Runway where Heidi Klum gives the designers one day to stitch together a wardrobe for the soon-to-hit-the-toy-stores Bi-Polar Barbie
A publicity still from "I Was an Incontinent Space Widow," a daring independent film directed by Darren Aronofsky and starring Charlize Theron, which swept the awards at Sundance

[Louis Vuitton Bags]

Um...Lady?

Ms. Gaga?

Hi. May we call you Ga? Why are you staring at us? Is that a "no"?

So, what do you say we hop the next spaceship to Planet Claire and order a pitcher of Supernovatinis? Or we could just go to TGI Friday's and slam back some fuzzy navels...same diff, really. Doesn't that just sound marvy? We KNOW!

Listen. Here's the deal. You're a serious broad. And we've resisted writing this BNoFC because you're fully aware (indeed, you're the architect) of your craziocity. And anyone who ridicules your LSD-inspired wardrobe is woefully UNaware that the joke is on them. You are begging to be talked about. You frequently leave the house having remembered to bobby-pin a Judy Jetson wig to your noggin, yet somehow you always forget the pants. Beyond that, while we rather enjoyed the rumors that you serve your hair pie with a side of kielbasa, we also strongly suspect you were the one behind that particular meme. You are, as our Beantown friends might say, "wicked smaht."

[Wholesale Handbags On Sale]

blouse, hike up a pair of crotchless satin Depends, and secure a Charo wig to your noggin with what appears to be the wrapper from a Hickory Farms "deepest sympathy" cheese and fruit basket.

We're certain it seemed like a good idea at the time. But you look like you're attending the funeral of your sanity. See here's the thing. You're a trend-setter. Do you really want the entire world to start wearing their underoos as outerwear? Have you given the slightest thought to the potential ramifications? For starters, it would force us to cover our furniture in plastic. Is that what you really want?

You look like (pick one):

Morgan Fairchild in a very special Lifetime movie-of-the-week called "Not Without My Mom-jeans," the heart warming story of a woman who goes into mourning when The Gap discontinues their line of high-waisted acid wash stretch pants
The winning design from that episode of Project Runway where Heidi Klum gives the designers one day to stitch together a wardrobe for the soon-to-hit-the-toy-stores Bi-Polar Barbie
A publicity still from "I Was an Incontinent Space Widow," a daring independent film directed by Darren Aronofsky and starring Charlize Theron, which swept the awards at Sundance
That long lost episode of Love Boat, wherein cruise director Julie McCoy spikes the punch with ecstasy causing Charo to hurl herself overboard, whereupon her distraught lesbian lover Donna Mills disrupts a shuffleboard tournament with her shocking announcement that her girdle's been possessed by beelzebub.
Bloody hell.

[uggs outlet]

Your opinion is very good

[human hair extensions]

very good.,!