A Tale of Two Genies

If you're like us (and you aren't, but you can dream), when you hear the word "genie" you think about Barbara Eden emerging from her over-zealously upholstered bottle-shaped efficiency studio in a blast of pink bong smoke in order to blink all sorts of hilarious things into existence, thereby complicating the life of her nervous master, astronaut JR Ewing.

You remember course, several times Babs Eden had us seeing quadruple when her evil brunette twin (imaginatively named Jeannie II) poofed onto the scene so they could double their shenanigans and jiggle their boobulars in stereo.

And today, the evil brunette Jeannie II seems to have been uncorked. She has re-emerged. And she's up to no damn good.

The gullible citizens of the colorful, malodorous, perpetually flooded nation of Bangladesh have recently been receiving phone calls from a rude entity that claims to be a "genie from the sky," demanding money or terrible things will happen to their families (um...not for nothing, but presumably their families already live in Bangladesh, how much worse can things really get?).

One wonders how retarded a person must be to buy such an unlikely story. After all, were we a genie from the sky (and after our third shot of tequila we often are), we like to think we'd choose to emerge from a Mr. Coffee or a hip flask for maximum effect, rather than dragging a wireless carrier into it. On the other hand, sometimes the Jehovah's Witnesses ring our doorbell, trying to convince us to drink their Kool-Aid and give them cash on behalf of their very own sky-genie, so this particular brand of idiocy isn't exclusive to Bangladesh.

Meanwhile, the multi-tasking Jeannie II has been tormenting an unfortunate family in the dazzling mecca of Mahd Al Dahab Saudi Arabia. She's calling them names and ridiculing their fashion sense, tossing things about and spitting in their baba-ghanoush. So the family's irate patriarch has decided to grab Jeannie II by her brunette weave and haul her into the notoriously practical Saudi court system. This will likely result in Barbara Eden being dragged to a public square and flogged for her Genie-osity (and for gallivanting about in a midriff-revealing harem outfit).

On a side note, as we learned from her confirmation hearings yesterday, wise latina Sonya Sotomayor is alarmingly familiar with the use of nunchucks, the lethal weapon of choice for discerning ninjas. Were the mischievous Jeannie II to appear before the Supreme Court nominee's bench, So-So's likely to get all Chuck Norris on her ass and conk Jeannie II back into re-runs. 

xox
WAM

Jeannie sez: "My master made me blink him a subscription to this blog's feed."

Comments

[Leeuna]

Do people actually believe in genies? (geni) Oops. I just took the stopper out of a bottle I found...

[Rambosf]

If the US can believe Saddam H. when he said he had WMD because he wanted to play the game of "Biggest Dick in the Desert", let the Bangladeshi people believe in a Genie or two. It's a lot less painful than going to war.

[Whup-Ass Master]

@leeuna: Yes, in fact people DO believe in Geniosity. It's a muslim thing (shocked?)

@rambo: maybe saddam was a genie! that explains so much (except, of course, his execution)

xox
WAM

[Rambosf]

WAM...actually, I don't think he was a genie...would a genie wear such horrible fitting tight whiteys? No, he was just the run of the mill...wait, I'm rethinking my answer. Perhaps it's just a translation issue...Genie - Genocide. Perhaps Saddam is a genie with bad underwear. HMMMMM

[Whup-Ass Master]

@rambo: a genie with bad underwear? We think that's the most apt description of saddam we've ever heard.

xox
WAM

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