HALO! Chirp-chirp-chirp BOING! Lover boy Matthew Barney and I have recently completed another joint project in which I warble in the high-pitched language of the porpoise while he (dressed as a transsexual druid priest named Ploppo) slides face-first down a Vaseline covered slip-n-slide into a vat of green jello and yak eyeballs. That's when we slice open the belly of a whale and out pops a slime-covered Joanne Worley who sings the Oscar Mayer jingle in Esperanto.
I shall skip like an elf now.
LA-LA-LA! Barney boy and Björk pretend we're salmon when we make the sticky icky sex dance. We flop about in a sandbox costumed as frogmen and blow Cool Whip through our snorkels at each other for five hours then he jumps on me and violates my Icelandic fjord. And then we spawn. LOO-LOO-POO-POO-GA!!!
Meow. I now wear a dead animal and call it a ball gown.
Don't talk to me! I am a fish.
dee-dee-da-da-la....
I don't understand why no-one seems to be commenting on these posts. They're GREAT! I'm laughing my (whupped) ass off!!!
Truth has a real ZING, huh? ;) Keep tellin' it.
Posted by: Cameron | March 27, 2007 at 09:10 PM
Hey Cameron...thanks for the props, bitch. Could be no one's commenting cause our little "whup-ass" blog is so new. We've only been doin this shit since feb 6! tell yer friends bitch. and go spread joy. WAM
Posted by: Whup-Ass Master | March 27, 2007 at 09:31 PM
BITCH! I will spread the joy, bitch! :)
Posted by: Cameron | March 28, 2007 at 08:36 PM
Preach it, trash. WAM
Posted by: Whup-Ass Master | March 28, 2007 at 08:55 PM